21 Reasons Why Life without Facebook is Totally Awesome

flower girl

So many things fall to the wayside when chained to Facebook for endless hours days months years. Some time away allows you to see the many ways it negatively impacts your life.

For the past two weeks, I’ve spent a total of fifteen minutes on Facebook, which is no easy feat. As you can see >HERE<, getting off for even an hour was once a near-impossibility.

If you are anything like me, you too, may be unhappy with the amount of time you waste in the vice-grip of status-updates, friend requests, and all the jingly bells and screeching whistles that go along with a life glued together at the seams with good old Facebook. Because I’ve enjoyed my break so much–I wanted to entice you to give it a try.

Here are 21 Reasons why life without Facebook is totally awesome, and why I’ll be limiting my time there to fifteen minutes, one day a week from now, until further notice. 🙂

21. Less chair ass

If you’ve experienced the torturous hell that is hours of writing, whilst fighting Facebook distraction (and losing), followed by the darkest moments of a writer’s existence–chair ass–you understand. Often times, this is accompanied by mouse-wrist and/or typing-elbow. (Yes, I am aware I just made these up, but these writer ailments should have names, shouldn’t they?)

20. More exercise

19. More time outside

18. More time with children/friends/family

First on any list of dietary restrictions should be Facebook: Serving size I’LL SLURP OUT YOUR SOUL AND SAUTEE THAT MOTHER WITH TWITTER BALLS AND PINTEREST NUTS SO JUST SIGN YOUR LIFE SAVINGS OVER TO CANDY CRUSH NOW AND CALL IT A DAY.

Last week, I walked a total of four miles. On purpose. And not just to get to the nearest Wi-Fi hotspot, either. I did it because, hello, I opened my eyes to the wide world around me and decided, what the hell, I’ll go for a stroll. Destination? Starbucks. There was a venti nonfat carmel iced coffee calling my name. Funny, I didn’t hear it when I had my Facebook earmuffs on. Who knew those things were soundproof? Distance: two miles. It was a beautiful, sunny, relatively warm, late-spring Dallas, Texas afternoon. There were bugs. And noise. I perspired. I pushed my son in his stroller as he experienced the wide world around us from little toddler eyes. It was beautiful. 

It’s common sense; less time playing kissy-face with Facebook leaves room for endless possibilities of fuzzy-feeling real life stuff like being active and spending time with family and whatnot.

17. More time to write

Okay, raise your hand if you’re guilty of using “platform” as an excuse to insert Facebook into your body intravenously?

Uh-huh. *gives you evil eye*

I don’t wanna hear it. Platform shmatform. You don’t exactly need platform if you don’t have a book to sell, right? And even if you do have a book to market, think of how many more you could have if you didn’t spend so much time stroking the Zuckerburg…. I have a lot of writer friends, and not a one of them has ever gushed about how Facebook sells tons of books. If you’ll check out your top NYT bestselling authors, you will rarely find them spending hours–if any time at all–on Facebook. They do what writers are supposed to do. They write.

16. More time to do housework and other things you’ve been procrastinating

I get it, I really do. Hunting down the perfect meme-of-the-hour is way more appealing than doing the dishes. But your significant other is tired of doing them while you harvest friends on Facebook. Or your kids are tired of wearing dirty and/or wrinkled clothes because surfing meaningless status updates and filling your little brainy with mindless chatter that means ultimately jack to you and your life–seems more important to you than doing their laundry.

And shower, cuz… damn. *pinches nose*

15. More time to do other (than writing) things you love

Facebook is a drug that should come with dosage information and a warning label. And certain people should really cut it out mostly, or entirely from their life. Being a recovered drug addict/alcoholic, I have an addictive personality. I get “stuck” on stuff if I’m not careful, and then hours days months years go by and I look up and realize EVERYONE IS DEAD AND THE WORLD HAS BECOME A DESOLATE WASTELAND IN WHICH THE UNDEAD HAVE TAKEN OVER AND I MUST NOW LEARN HOW TO SHOOT A CROSSBOW LIKE DARYL DIXON AND TELL TIME BY THE SUN’S POSITION IN THE SKY AND LEARN THAT MOSS GROWS ON THE NORTH SIDE OF TREES OR WHATEVER AND ALL THAT’S LEFT TO EAT THAT HASN’T BEEN LOOTED ARE THOSE LITTLE DRIED CRAWFISH THINGYS WITH EYES THAT YOU FIND AT MEXICAN SUPERMARCADOS…

Not a good scene.

Would I rather spend my pre-apocalypse moments on Facebook, stalking Daryl Dixon (well, actually…), or doing fulfilling things that make me happy, like making cool stuff with my hands?

Tough call.

*sighs*

*stomps foot*

I guess I’ll take the art. (As long as I can watch reruns of “The Walking Dead” after.) 😀

14. You see who your true friends are

I’ve made a lot of good friends on Facebook. Almost 3,000 as of last Sunday, actually. And every other Tuesday, we get together and go bowling and then go to the spa afterwards and I catch the tab on a few rounds of those little umbrella drinkys…

Yeah.

I can count the true friends I’ve made on Facebook on two hands. From what I can tell, most of them out there are looking out for numero uno. I am but a drop in the bucket, of which may as well be a toilet. Taking a step back, I was able to see who I miss, which is a surefire way to tell who you really care about. And most of those people have my email address and some of them have even acquired the much sought-after 10 digits of happiness, and I don’t mean fingers. Some of them even call me on the… phone. *GASP!*

13. You can address your festering narcissism and get some effing humility

If no one has told you today, you are a precious little snowflake and everyone on Facebook–all of the internet and the world even–should stare at the exquisite uniqueness that is your Facebook profile. They should soak up every single status update from now, until the beginning of time, memorizing the luscious deets and “liking” every post, every comment, every picture, and every single little marvel that is your totally real, unfiltered, un-photo-shopped real life. Really.

And if they don’t…

Gah, how dare they. The nerve.

12. No Facebook drama

Does this really need explanation?

11. No Facebook trolls

*please hold while I squeeze into my ranty-panties*

There is nothing that pisses me off more than those still-living-with-momma social outcasts that have never seen the sun rise nor fall, that tell me what sort of sunscreen to put on my poochy. And worse yet, even blatantly judge me for putting the stuff on his furry be-hind in the first place. Hey, buddy, if I wanna put a gosh-dern t-back and tap shoes on my dog, that’s my own damn business and I don’t need you or anyone else to tell me how to–or not to–do it.

*tosses ranty-panties to neighbor’s poochy*

*snickers*

10. No more constant marketing

If I see your book cover one more time I’m going to hang you upside down by your toenails from the ceiling fan in my mind and flip the switch to the “on” position. Then I shall pop popcorn and set my demon puppy loose to chase you around, snapping at your hair or ears or what-have-you. And I shall laugh.

9. No more creepers/perves

In case you weren’t aware, Facebook just recently became a free dating site for the uber creeps and perves and still-living-at-home trolls. If you have never seen troll genitalia, be warned… the sight of this in an unsolicited private message has been known to cause vomiting, insomnia, loss of appetite, and in serious cases, blindness.

(NOTE: If you experience an erection that lasts for four hours or longer, well… you may be part of the problem. Seek professional help immediately. And in the meantime, please, stay the bejeezus away from Facebook.)

8. No more game requests

Do you hear that? It’s the sound of every harp in Heaven simultaneously playing Queen’s “We are the Champions,” because we have done it. We’ve won. People, ONE. Facebook game-requests, ZIP-O-ROOONIE.

7. No more clogging your mind space with unimportant crap

No, I was not aware that the African spotted muskrat is endangered. Please, post that Upworthy video all about it so that I can lose four minutes of my life learning all about them, and what I can do to ensure their future safety.

6. No more depressing selfie sessions to find that “perfect” profile pic

Of course, I have no personal experience with this one… but I had a friend once that, um…

yeah.

Next.

5. You no longer have to pretend to care about things you don’t care about

Hear that? (Isn’t it amazing how much you can hear without your Facebook earmuffs on?)

It’s the sound of 2,500 people clicking the “unfriend” button as they learn that I wish (I really do) I had enough mind-space, time, and heart, to give two squishy turds about what you ate for dinner, or how your husband wants you to get a bikini wax, or how your new Ferrari unfortunately had to go to the shop today to get the problem with the vibrating seats fixed. Because you paid extra for those  damn vibrating seats and by-God, they better vibrate on “GO.”

4. You no longer have to bite your tongue to keep from being an asshat to other asshats

If you hang out in a barber shop long enough, you’ll either get a haircut, become a barber, or try to eat that thing that looks like a candy cane because you’re hungry and you can’t take the curiosity any longer…

(Note: It does not taste like a candy cane.)

In the same manner, if you hang out on Facebook around asshats for too long, you too may start to present symptoms of asshatedness. You must ask yourself: Is it worth the risk?

3. You get a new perspective on life

This isn’t my first Facebook-free stint. I actually deleted my account three or so years ago, for a whole year. My finger hovered over the “deactivate account” button for–I shit you not–a whole hour. I sweated profusely. I pulled my hair out and I cried. I banged my fists on things and broke many pencils. Facebook had taken over my soul, and was eating my family, my life, and my sanity away at the seams like greedy little blue termites. When I finally pushed that button, I literally grieved the loss of my intangible, fabricated cyber-life, and all of the “friends” who would no longer “get to” be a part of my life.

Notice the self-righteous asshatedness (above) than soon became apparent. Once I stepped back, a week went by and I realized the sun was shining… “Whoa, when did the snow melt? What day is it? June? When the hell did summer get here? Where is my family?”

I had to integrate myself, not only back into the lives of my family–relearn their ways, their schedules, their habits, likes, dislikes–but I also had to be integrated back into society. It was serious culture shock. When you spend five or six hours a day on Facebook, you may as well be spending five or six hours a day at a dope house. Some of you may not have it this bad, but some of you can drink alcohol without it ruining your life, too. Others of you, like me, may hit a wall, where you have lost control. We are powerless over our Facebook addiction and our lives have become unmanageable. Stepping away removes a dark shroud that you didn’t even realize was there. You will experience life anew.

2.  Live life in the ever-mysterious and spontaneously beautiful now

Without the distraction of Facebook, I remember to enjoy life right now. Instead of “building that platform,” “marketing that book,” “cultivating that following,” all of which are future-oriented visions and aspirations, I can just enjoy the awesomeness that is my life right now. I can sit on my back porch and look at the sky and quiz my third-grader about what type of clouds are out today. I can play. I can breathe in deep the official first day of summer because I am experiencing it firsthand, not because I saw someone’s status update reminding me of it. I can be present in my life.

1. Freedom

Facebook is designed to hold you hostage. It is a prison without walls or bars. Sure, there are some good things therein… there are bible scriptures scrawled on prison walls, too, but that doesn’t make me want to go to prison any time soon. You?

Without Facebook to tie you down, you walk a free human. Free from ego, from narcissism, free from garbage-in garbage-out, free from the poisons there, disguised as profit, prosperity, popularity…

Without Facebook, you are free to just be. And live.

Until next time, fellow humans…

Just be. ❤

 

You can check out my books on Amazon here:

 The Treemakers (Book 1 in the Treemakers Trilogy) (Mature YA Dystopian Scifi Horror)

The Soultakers (Book 2 in the Treemakers Trilogy)

The Seeker’s Keys (Book 3 in the Treemakers Trilogy)

The Truth About Mud (YA Fantasy Adventure novelette)

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39 thoughts on “21 Reasons Why Life without Facebook is Totally Awesome

  1. Pingback: 11 Rules for Being the Best Writerly Soul You Can Be « Christina L. Rozelle

  2. Pingback: Hello, my name is Christina, and I’m addicted to Facebook. « Christina L. Rozelle

  3. excellent post! thanks soooo much! me and my fiance have just deactivated our accounts now! for the vast majority of reasons stated! 😦 I feel a little bit scared but ultmatly free!!! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. The reason you don’t see me anymore on Facebook is because I left this fucking retarded website. Mark Zuckerberg and the entire Facebook company can suck my dick, bunch of bloody idiots feeding off people’s need for social connection and peer approval. It’s not real. It’s addiction, what porn is for sex, Facebook is for approval and connection. It’s a quick fix that in the end will only leave you empty and unsatisfied, craving even more for the thing you didn’t really get in the first place.

    I will try to get those needs solely met in the real world from now on, and make an attempt to live a real life. And the only acceptable online connection with someone online for me is one on one (aka e-mail, Skype, chat). At least then you know the connection with the other person actually exists..

    Onwards and upwards my friend towards a life worth living.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Are you still off? This is the 3rd time I have deleted my account. I am a grown man and was sucked into arguments, etc and thought, what am I doing? I was literally very angry at people on facebook, for what? comments? it was so stupid when I stepped back and looked at it. I get on the computer and find myself about to log on as a reflex. I think I will put my tablet in my wifes car trunk so when shes at work, I cant get on my tablet for no reason at all. I still have a smart phone, but I am trying to leave it on the kitchen counter when at home just to hear if I get a call but not in my pocket.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Omg…..you nailed everything about “the facebook”. I have been Facebook free for just a few hours. Hahahaha gosh I sound like a drug addict. Sad huh.
    I am taking back ME……my true friends………and life with my husband and kiddos.
    The world is a great place and I’m gonna find it with the ones I care about most, and the ones that care about me. Like I told a few………I’m going back to the stone age. You know my number so call or text……..better yet pick up that phone that used to hang on the wall. Bomb then and only then will you see your true friends. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Ps I love the asshat comment……….and one of the ultimate reasons I had enough of “the facebook”. My theory is “the facebook” should be renamed to “asshat central” cause asshat is as asshat does ;)*

    Liked by 2 people

  8. I quit Facebook almost 3 years ago. I requested they delete my account too. (Yeah, right – still there)

    I am very shy & the fact that so many people could see aspects of my life made me feel really uncomfortable. I tried playing with the privacy settings but it was still too much, so I quit.

    I am so happy I did. I have not gone back. I hope it passes like a trend.

    I just wish that more sites wouldn’t force you to use Google/Facebook to log in or post comments.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. “Without Facebook to tie you down, you walk a free human. Free from ego, from narcissism, free from garbage-in garbage-out, free from the poisons there, disguised as profit, prosperity, popularity…

    Without Facebook, you are free to just be. And live.”

    Not really. Ultimate freedom is an illusion. None is really free, unless he’s actually nuts. Nice line tho, gave you 265 shares on Facebook.

    Sorry for being bitter. I’m having a should/I/stay/should/I/go/crisis as well, some years after the first one.

    It seems to me that Facebook has become so much interwoven with reality, that it’s hard to distinguish the online persona from the offline. It’s like a cave inside The Cave (Plato’s cave).

    I suppose if one day Facebook closed down, without a notice, many people would go crazy. This is pretty scary. But I suppose when that day comes, and the trend will have passed, something else will take its place. Like Facebook overthrew Myspace. And Myspace IRC.

    I suppose I’m getting older. Maybe I shouldn’t care that much.

    Hope it works out for you. Keep it up.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I wrote this a while back before I became a big time indie author (not really), but now I’m back on FB all day, every day. 😦 I’m disenchanted with it often and take a ton of breaks from it though. But unfortunately, I do feel like I have to be on there to market my books and all that PR stuff. Whether or not that’s true–I don’t know. I haven’t ventured out there yet. When I wrote this, I don’t think I had published my first book yet. But these days, you can’t even deactivate your goddamned account. Seriously, these Zuckerfuckers make it damn near impossible for you to cut the FB cord. I do hope it crashes one day. All of it (internet). I have a sort of morbid curiosity about what will happen next…

      Like

  10. Pingback: Effective Bookish Facebook Groups: Featuring Band of Dystopian Authors & Fans | A Spark in the Dark

  11. I too found your page by Googling, “Life without Facebook.”

    I deleted my account about 4 years ago. A recent breakup was the impetus but I was also weirded out by the ads popping up saying so-and-so “likes” this. A high school teacher of mine (who’s married) was said to have liked OkCupid. That was totally screwed up. If it was true or not, I don’t know, but I definitely didn’t want to know such things about my HS teacher.

    I stayed off for about 3 months. Got back on because turning my back on society didn’t seem like the smartest thing for a newly single person living alone.

    In retrospect, those 3 months were actually great! I was much more creative and happier in general.

    Recently I’ve found myself getting disgusted by just about everyone on the site. Annoyed and tired – not to mention endlessly depressed everytime I log on because so many posts seem like a gut punch to my psyche. I’ve realized it’s turning me into the worst version of me I could imagine – Jealous, insensitive and angry.

    Yeah, I say I was disgusted by everyone on the site, but I really think I was deeply disgusted with myself. And that’s a terrible place to find yourself.

    I’ve deleted the app from my phone and am seeing how long I can go without logging on through a browser.

    The site is a monster and I think a big reason why everyone seems so divided on a lot of levels.

    Fight the good fight! Stay off as much as you can!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Wow, I can so relate to what you said. I’m just as fascinated as I am disgusted at how Facebook has completely taken over every aspect of modern society. There are some good things, sure, but I’m pretty sure it’s the AntiChrist. I have a morbid curiosity with wondering how it will all fall to pieces one day… What will we do?! Actually talk to each other and experience life in the here and now?? God, it seems like it’s been forever since those days.
      I miss those days 😦
      I’m currently taking a nice, long break from it-for the most part. I have also deleted it from my phone, but have yet to figure out how to stay off completely for good. *sigh*
      The struggle is real. It is really real. For real.
      But this, too, shall pass…eventually!

      Thanks for the comment, and good luck to you, too!

      Like

  12. Wow, I can’t believe this post was over 2 years ago. I’ve been so frustrated with facebook lately due to politics, but I’ve always wondered….is FB really necessary. Talk about your real life soap opera channel and make enemies fast newsfeed. I just have to quickly comment on your #21 Less Chair Ass. That was enough for me to get off of FB. I laughed my ass off when I read that. I use FB more for business than personal, but neither one is very helpful. I’ve vanished for days at a time and nobody says anything so it’s high time to just give up on it and spend better time on more important things. FB is fizzing out anyway. I loved your post. Thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’m glad you enjoyed this, and thank you for the comment. Unfortunately, the life of the indie author has chained me to the Facebook more than I’d like to admit, as of late. I do take constant breaks (I’m on a 3-day “sabbatical” as we speak), and often fantasize about pulling the plug on it altogether. Maybe I will. Maybe it’ll all crash and burn, and we’ll yet again experience what real life (without Facebook) is like. I won’t lie–I’m looking forward to it.

      Like

  13. Thank you so much it’s 2 am. I had a huge group and over 5k friends in Facebook yesterday I delete it. I was feeling blank and Google got me here to be honest I was depressed and even mood went to suicidal extreme but after reading this I’m feeling I got a life and did myself a favor by doing that. Thank you so much. God bless 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • John,
      I’m so glad I was able to help you through a tough time. Trust me, I know how difficult it is to sever the cord between us and social media/Facebook. But you won’t regret it. Now you can get back to your roots and rediscover the beautiful world and people around you. And remember, you’re not alone! Hang in there ♡

      Like

  14. I just deactivated my profile today. I have done it in the past but never lasted long. I’m just honestly so sick of facebook! You get together with family or friends to eat dinner, camping, etc and what’s everybody doing, on facebook on their phones! People cant even enjoy time with their friends or family anymore because everybody is on their dang phones. I feel like facebook has become the worst version of every family. People will literally post that their grandma is in the hospital before calling and informing the rest of the family, so somebody logs on and that how they find out from their cousin or someone that their own grandmother is in the hospital. I have seen it happen hundreds of times and it’s even happened within my own family before. At the same time, facebook is an addiction, it makes it so hard to stay off of it! Mostly because every dang body is on it these days, you will have people ask you “did you see what I tagged you in on facebook?’.. You cant make people understand why you’re not on facebook and for them to simply text or call you. Plus it makes you feel like your life isn’t meaningful without it, you take a picture or go to an event and you feel like you should automatically be sharing this with facebook. Kids entire lives are literally documented these days from birth because parents are posting picture after picture. Ugh! Sorry for my LONG rant! I hope to hear back from you soon.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I agree with everything you said, Jessica. It’s so hard to break free. I haven’t posted anything in about 2 weeks, but since I have an indie author thing going now, I do log in to check messages and notifications a couple times a day, so that I can respond to my readers and author friends who message or tag me, or whatever. Because if I don’t respond they take it as I’m ignoring them, maybe, I don’t know. I try to let people know that I take time off to focus on writing, so I just hope they understand that my time away is so that I can do that more (and be in the moment in my life more, as opposed to glued to a screen), and not because I’m not interested in their lives… What a dilemma! The whole world is on Facebook, but I can honestly say I think the world would be a better place without it, as you said. And I can’t wait to see what lies beyond its collapse. A girl can dream, right? 😉

      And good for you for backing away! I hope you enjoy this time to yourself. It certainly is good for the soul. ❤

      Like

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